Pride Month

As a Christian and the dad of a gay son, I’d like to examine my own feelings today about Pride Month. I say “examine” because I’m still feeling my way around the whole subject, myself. My son came out to my wife and I around five years ago. He waited until last year to come out to the rest of the family. I told him then that I’d love him unconditionally, regardless of his sexuality. I told him that he was the same young man that I’d watch grow into manhood, knowing that he was a good person and a fine son. Even if I couldn’t claim to understand what he was going through, I’d accept who he is, and try to support his decision to live his life as he saw fit. It’s his life. He must live it. I just have to love him, and I do. Sounds simple, right? Let’s dig a little further, and I’ll try not to bury myself.

I’m a conservative guy, with traditional views of sexuality. My son is well aware of my views, and we agree to disagree on some basic things. It’s not that we avoid talking about them, just that we understand each other enough to know two very important things. 1) We disagree and 2) we love each other without needing to agree. I didn’t change my religious, or political, views when he came out to me. I reflected, read, researched, thought and prayed about how I felt, and how I believed, quite a lot. I’m sure he spent years doing the same thing. I still believe as I did before. I also still love the man I’ve seen him grow to be today. His character hasn’t changed in a fundamental way. I know he is experiencing life differently than he did before. I think he is enjoying more freedom in his life, with his truth being known. I know he’s still a humble, giving and kind person. I know his strength and his love are two vibrant aspects of his character. I know he is a good man. I couldn’t love him any more than I do today.

Pride Month was brought about because society, religion, and government used to make it policy to repress sexual expression in the past. It wasn’t just taboo, it was (in most states and cities) illegal. People were arrested, jailed and beaten for their sexual orientation, or activities. In the past, people of the wrong race, or gender, were treated similarly. As an American, I believe we all have the right to our own “pursuit of happiness” without fear of persecution. I believe we all have the same rights, under the law. Not more rights, or less rights, but the same rights. If I can use my religious beliefs to take away your rights, then someone else can use their religious beliefs to take away my rights. It’s that simple. I understand that my freedom stops at the end of my nose, and so does yours. While I feel that many groups, and individuals, take their freedoms way too far, that’s the price we pay for living in a free society. People have the right, in the United States of America, to live their lives without fear. The people who celebrate Pride Month have that right, too.

While I must say that I’ve never flown a Rainbow Flag during Pride Month, I’ve been considering it. I’ve never marched in an LGBTQ Parade, either, but there’s always that possibility. I hold many beliefs that are inconsistent with the gay lifestyle and its political ideologies. I would still consider flying that flag, or marching in that parade, if just to celebrate one thing. The one thing that tells me that all people of the LGBTQ community are not stereotypes. The one thing that shows me, by example, that different doesn’t mean bad. The one thing that reminds me that, even in groups of people I may disagree with, there are people of stellar character and worth. The one thing that pushes me to love, instead of judge. His name is Mike.